I'll Never Walk Alone

Yes, I'm still alive and kicking. I have no vindication for my long-term absence, I'm afraid. I got lazy. Simple as that.

So, my 3-week vacation in England was fantastic. I loved it. My daily confrontation by the blazing hot weather in Malaysia ever since I got home made me miss the frigid days in Britain more. Seriously, what is up with the weather these days? Just last week, I think I broke a personal record by taking 6 showers in one night. One week of flaking of dead skin followed.

Anyway, I shall leave an entry of England for another day. A day when I can be arsed to get around and upload the pictures and not have tears swell whenever I reminisce what wonderful country it is.

Today, I had a pretty strange experience.

I consecutively watched 2 movies in the cinema.

No, that's not strange. But I went to the movies on my own. On a Friday night.

Not what most Malaysians would enjoy doing or proudly declare it as an achievement, Malaysians are too self-centred to be caught doing things alone. General consensus in this country thinks that doing things alone is "sad". Malaysians hardly eat alone. They think it's uncanny to sit in Starbucks to read a book without company. Heck, most of us can't even get to the washroom by ourselves. Our society, Asians being the most prevalent instance, are too afraid of being alone. We can't seem to differentiate "alone" from "lonely". Monophobia, scientifically speaking, is the fear and anxiety of being alone.

When I purchased my movie tickets at the counter, the young cashier gave me a peculiar gaze when I asked for only one ticket. He reasserted the amount of tickets I wanted in a tone of incredulity. I must be the topic of the day for the staffs of the cinema. The lonely guy who spent Friday night watching 2 movies alone when people were partying and gallivanting across town with "friends" they hardly know.

The cashier boy was the first manifest that we Malaysians suffer from Monophobia.

When I strode into the chilly theatre 17 of the cinema, I was shot with stares of confusion from couples and groups of friends that were intertwined in their respective cliques. I dismissed the queasy glances and plunked myself in the plush, comfortable seat at the back row. The seat next to mine was vacant, obviously. I had the luxury of extra space to store my stash of cheap cinema food and my bag. Hey, that's a perk of going to the movies alone.

Sadly, I missed the last 10 minutes of the first show, as I had to hop over to theatre 4 for the next movie on my agenda. I was 5 minutes late so as I ran down the steps to locate my designated seat, I could feel the intimidating chill of walking into a jam-packed cinema alone burgeoning on my spine. I quickly sat myself down and thoroughly enjoyed another 2 hours blockbuster goodness.

As the credits rolled, everyone started to leave the room. I was the only solitary patron walking behind a swamp of people too busy discussing about the movie to even have the chivalry to hold the exit door open for the person behind. Couples glued to the hips. Friends sharing laughters. Families searching for the washrooms. I realised being alone sometimes allow me to see the world in a more defined manner. I gain inspirations when I am in solitude. I concentrate better and I think more. I people watch more when I have no company. I guess I am secure enough to not be afraid of being alone once in awhile. I don't feel miserable or pitiful when I'm alone. I'm as comfortable sitting in Starbucks alone as I am with good company. I think everyone needs quality time alone from time to time.

Ah. What a great Friday night, I thought to myself as I unlocked the doors of my car. 4 solid hours without talking to anyone, without having to express myself for the sake of social acceptance. My temporary recluse was the perfect finish to a week at the office desk.

Tomorrow, at 6am, I'll be heading to a forest reserve for team building activities with my workmates. Tomorrow, I will be a part of the social process once again.

The Deal About Earth Hour

Earth Hour. It is the talk of the town right now. Everyone is talking about it, the radio stations are blaring the announcements, the newspapers are urging people to participate and the televisions are filled to the brim with everything Earth Hour.

I first came to know about Earth Hour during the annual Advertising Festival in Pattaya, Thailand last year. The advertising agency behind this effort - Leo Burnett Sydney, subsequently bagged numerous awards for this campaign.

This year, not only have they decided to continue milking the crap out of this idea, they are taking it to the next level. More cities across the globe were picked, and advertising and promotions for this campaign were as aggressive as Marilyn Manson in a church. I started analysing this campaign when Malaysia was chosen as one of the participating cities and I can now safely conclude that although the intentions and message behind Earth Hour are noble and gracious, it is still a silly, stupid idea nonetheless.

Weeks of running these expensive advertisements on every possible media known to mankind, and the end product? TRYING to get people to switch off their lights for 1 hour during a specific time and date. And what's with the use of celebrities on the television commercials? It's global warming for the love of God, we are not selling doughnuts to children here. From what I read and have been told, all these advertising cost are sponsored out of goodwill from corporations across the world.

I can safely estimate that the media cost of running this campaign in Malaysia alone exceeds half a million. Let me put this straight, we are spending millions in advertising for something that is only going to last for an hour? You might argue that it's all about creating awareness, not so much of seeing the instant effect of it. But wait, in 2007, Australia celebrated the success of Earth Hour by hosting a grand fireworks show. So much for curbing global warming eh?

It doesn't make sense. The entire "shut off your lights for 60 minutes" idea will be quickly forgotten within the following hour. Like I said, the intention is good and the purpose is noble, but the idea and execution is silly, glorified, expensive and ineffective. Switching your lights and electrical appliances off whenever necessary should be practiced at all times, not just for that one hour on that one day.

If the whole point of this campaign is to create awareness about global warming, isn't it more feasible and practical to use the sponsorship to produce electricity-saving lightbulbs, and subsequently give it out for free to the public? Does that not drill home more awareness into people's minds? Does that not actually save electricity for a longer period of time?

How about using the money to produce a documentary ala "An Inconvenient Truth" and distribute the DVDs to the people for free? Isn't teaching, educating and informing the dangers of global warming and the ways to counter it more important than turning off that switch for one hour? Al Gore definitely taught me more about global warming than silly celebrities poking fun at Malaysian dialects for 30 seconds in the TV.

But of course, these alternative ideas will never allow the advertising agency to win another celebrated accolade in the next advertising award show. What is the entire point of this campaign anyway? Global warming or a hidden agenda of winning awards? You tell me.

So this "Earth Hour" day, instead of playing stupid with the rest of the world and switching off my lights, I'll walk over to Carrefour and spend RM10 on an electricity-saving light bulb. Now eat that.

We Do Not Remember

We are all separated by colours; because we do not remember the vibrant moments that held us together.

We are all separated by geographical distance; because we do not remember our forefathers who travelled the world on foot.

We are all separated by social status; because we do not remember the people who made us who we are today.

We are all separated by the size of our bank accounts; because we do not remember that the simplest pleasures are gratuitous.

We are all separated by the beliefs we share; because we do not remember the faith we had for one another.

We are all separated by the clothes on our body; because we do not remember the warmth of sharing a quilt.

We are all separated by the cars we drive; because we do not remember the joy of walking next to a companion.

We are all separated by families; because we do not remember that we are all products of the same bloodline.

We are all separated by political factions; because we do not remember the responsibilities we have towards our nation.

We are all separated by music; because we do not remember the delight a simple birthday song can bring to our ears.

We are all separated by dialects; because we do not remember that the most powerful language is from the body.

We are all separated by the sizes; because we do not remember that is how we are unambiguously distinguishable from one to another.

We are all separated by religion; because we do not remember that we all share a common faith in humanity.

We are all separated by cultures; because we do not remember how one tradition studies from another.

We are all separated by Masters and PhDs, because we do not remember that life itself is a journey of knowledge.

We are all separated by goals; because we do not remember that we all share the same vision.

We are all separated by thousands of things that define us who we are.

Because we do not remember one simple fact - that behind every flaw and difference, we are all only human, bound to leave as how we came: empty, worthless and naked.

I'm Hooked

Like a junkie or a chronic smoker, I'm hooked. But of course, my current addiction does not weigh the equal severeness of cocaine or marijuana. It's far worse than that.

I have been clocking in an average of 3 hours of sleep every night for the past 2 weeks. My eyes are all sore and welled up. My nose is leaking like the roof of our government buildings. I have been isolating myself in the solitude of my own home. I have been skipping meals and at times I contemplated if I should put my bladder to the ultimate test of resistance.

This "drug" of mine sends a myriad of sensations into all my senses whenever I get my fix. Calling this phenomenon aphrodisiacal would be an utter understatement, something this good should never be categorised with oysters and cheap chocolates. It's more like a... I don't know, a pearl white Audi S4 with Megan Fox behind the wheels? Throughout the course of my new found addiction, my family members have lost hope in talking me out of it. Whenever they tried squeezing an ounce of response from me, they would find me in a mental state of trance, totally sequestrating myself from external commotions.

Recently, the hunger for this fix got out of hand. I've been doing it in the workplace. I'm even doing it as I'm writing this entry with the attention span of a goldfish. It's bad I know. But I guess that's what rehabs are for.

As a colleague walked past my workdesk, she wailed again,

"IE TJER! WATCHING THE GEM OF LIFE AGAIN AH!"



Sigh. 62 more episodes to go. I've been reminded why I tend to develop this love-hate relationship with Hong Kong dramas. They should really establish a law against these addictive entertainment for the employed.

Noodle Fair

When one mentions "PC Fair", computers and all its related gizmos come into mind. When one mentions "Food Fair", scrumptious delicacies come into mind. When one mentions "Education Fair", universities, colleges, varsities and the pursuit of higher education comes to mind.

Today, despite my 4 years of experience in the crafty advertising industry should have been more than sufficient to allow me to learn this one simple fact: do not trust advertisements... I fell for the trick again.

"Noodle Fair".

The vibrant and colourful signage with lively illustrations of noodles adorning it seemed inviting and tasteful from afar. See, there was a "Noodle Fair" going on in Jusco. Interesting, I thought. Images of Japanese chefs handmaking their signature Ramen, the Chinese sifus skillfully pulling the noodles, Italian maestros preparing pastas etc. came into mind when I saw the signage from the descending escalator.

Sometimes, I blame myself for setting too high of expectations on things around me. Because the apparent "Noodle Fair", now listen to this, was just about Jusco selling a wide range of instant noodles at cut-price. Maggi, Mamee, Cintan and the usual brands you can find in hypermarkets.

Instant noodles.  On sale. "Noodle Fair".

I'll be looking forward to purchase a few cans of sardines on sale from the next "Exotic Seafood Fair". Maybe some canned tuna and prawn crackers as well.